Sophisticated Situations

Yesterday, the department treated all the senior girls and a few of our favorite professors to an afternoon tea at a local inn. It was precious. I dressed in my floweriest girliest sundress... Sophistication may not be my forte. To be fair, though, I think this sort of tea is every little girl's dream come true. I should have taken more pictures.

When we sat down, there was a menu with at least twelve types of tea available for selection. I chose a tea called "Tea of Good Tidings" [...seriously] that was a mix of spices and ... other leaves. I chose it because it had rose in the description. 

Our waiter [it should be noted that he had a soul patch] spoke in an extremely affected tone as he described the intricate steeping process for our teas, served in individual tea pots. Chill out,  I'm pretty sure I've been making Lipton tea since I was in the womb. Same thing. 

Full disclosure: I snickered when our waiter brought out our "sweets & savories". His affected manner was just too much, and also I am incredibly appropriate.

I definitely enjoyed the food - perhaps a little too much. When one of the others didn't want her sandwich [excuse me, "savory"], I was quick to snag it. But don't worry, I was super classy about it.

superb photography

I really loved our tea, and I thought it was a great idea. How lucky am I to be part of a close-knit department that celebrates with its seniors?

As much as I enjoyed it, however, I am starting to think that I might not be the most sophisticated person you've ever met. At the tea yesterday...I spilled the tea. At last week's endowment dinner, I threw my roll across the room [mostly...entirely on accident]. And when I tried to joke with the grad student next to me about using the wrong fork, he just gave me a look [...grad students, amirite]. At tonight's department dinner, I told the underclassman next to me to switch seats [i'm a senior, i've paid my dues...] so I could sit next to Steph and keep a running commentary during the speeches.

I'm not sure my loud and obnoxious schtick always translate in sophisticated situations. Also I feel like the fact that I call sophisticated situations sophisticated situations suggests that I am not perhaps the most prepared for sophisticated situations.

But if you ever need someone with whom you can go on a cupcake run, hit me up. This morning I woke up dreaming about cupcakes. Then I went and got a cupcake for breakfast. None of that is a joke.

-bRob

5-Year Plan

I went to an industrial engineering conference this weekend. I had a great time with these girls - eating, learning, listening, laughing, dancing....stuff. There were so many excellent speakers, and a good time was had by all. Or at least by me.

Something we learned during one lecture is to create SMART goals for yourself, where SMART is...

Specific

Measurable

Attainable

Realistic

Timely

via top achievement

In the spirit of professionalism and conferences and engineering and futures and soforth, and with specific and attainable goals in mind,  here is my five-year plan:

Step 1:
Post a video of me doing something [?] on the youtube. 

Ideas being tossed around include playing the cello and singing T.I.'s Live Your Life, and...ok, that's really the only idea I've got so far.

Step 2:
Become an internet sensation, kind of like this guy. 

Step 3:

I think we all agree that Step 2 would classify me as a celebrity.

Step 4: 

Try out [?] for Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice.

Step 5:
Dominate Celebrity Apprentice. 

Man, I love the premise of that show. And as an IE, I would blow those models and comedians out of the water. I hope my future friend Donald is reading this.

The real question is this: what other celebrities should be on my season of Apprentice? So far all I've got is IBM's Watson and probably the guy who plays Ron Swanson on Parks and Rec, for obvious reasons. We would clearly be the three muskateers of the show. 

Thoughts? Can you top my five-year plan?
[Doubt it]

-bRob